Piggie Plumpkins encounters the Femcan Convent.
Episode 21
“Ummmm--ummm-ummm-ummm!” Sister Ravenousetta moaned with pitiless pleasure, her lovely eyes closed in absolute ecstasy at the exquisite flavor of Plumpkins’ deep fried testicles--each still quivering with the final vestiges of life as her dainty teeth delicately bit down with relish.
For his part, Plumpkins could only whimper and whine in absolute utter despair as he suffered the rapacious revelings of the voluptuous vixens greedily gobbling up his remaining vital organs with vicious voraciousness. The gorgeous gang of gruesomely grizzly gourmands were treating his tormented torso as if it were a copious cornucopia of carnage.
Only the arrival of the beauteous Grand Inquistrix Dominique brought a halt to their ravenous rampage. Her arms reverently cradled a large ornate wrought iron contrivance. “I have brought this sacred artifact of Saintress Severina all the way from Europe.” Raising it on high, she declared with pride “The Crown of Coals! ”.
An astonished gasp of delight erupted from the ghoulish gathering. They quickly rotated the spit skewering Plumpkins from it’s vertical position back down to horizontal, then gathered around in a tight circle, eagerly tittering amongst themselves in anticipation.
With the aid of her Confessional Coven, Dominique placed the iron apparatus upon Plumpkins’ head and fastened it’s broad leather strap securely under his chin, pulling it so tight he was nearly choked as they roughly fastened the sturdy buckle.
The heartlessly heavy helmet rode hard upon his head, resting low upon the bridge of his nose and bending his ears forcefully sideways. The bottom brim was deeply serrated with saw-like teeth, drawing blood wherever it contacted flesh. The broadly spread points of the crown resembled a large basket--a dreadful clue to it’s intended function…
The Grand Inquistrix stood back with kidskin gloved hands set haughtily upon her shapely hips and nodded to her Coven, saying with a smirk “Let us ensure our customer is well pleased with the fit of his new hat…”
Her softly chuckling minions proceeded to callously crank on a series of robust tightening screws mounted low along the crown’s circumference, relentlessly squeezing ever tighter on Plumpkins’ skull--cruelly crushing into it, as befits a merciless medieval torture device.
Only when he emitted a long piteous moan of extreme discomfort did they cease--a sort of “Mmmwwhoaaahohohoa” sound that produced amused glances all round and gleeful claps of elation.
“Always nice to hear from a satisfied customer…” the youngest bully girl quipped with a mischievous grin, which was greeted by an uproar of merriment from the entire group.
Dominique quietly smiled to herself, turned to the kitchen crew and said blithely “He’s all yours now, sisters.”
The Head Sister Chef signaled the novitiates in her charge to proceed. They smartly jumped into action and scooped up a generous quantity of still glowing charcoal from the BBQ into a coal scuttle and brought it up next to Plumpkins’ head. With great care and consummate skill, the torrid embers were poured evenly around the basket of his crown, heaping them high.
Bright flames flared up as Plumpkins’ hair ignited briefly, to the ecstatic awe of all. Oohhs and aahhs erupted involuntarily from the crowd--as if they were attending spectacular fireworks display!
Inexorable heat penetrated the solid bone of Plumpkins’ skull, slowly baking his still conscious brain into a savoury pudding. The sadistic sisters all relished the unique spectacle and gathered in close, with eager anticipation of the delectable desert soon to come their way.
Prioress Painette then produced an elegant classic guitar and pronounced “Let us serenade our sinner’s imminent salvation and give him a proper sendoff to an eternity in Saintress Severena’s Devine Dungeon.”
Struming the guitar with a grin she said “I’m sure everyone knows the theme from our favorite story--The Singing Femcan…” She proceeded to sweetly sing and was instantly joined by the entire assemblage of widely smiling sisters.
(Sung to the tune of Dominique from the Singing Nun)
Severina--rina--rina
Of the Saintress we shall tell
Her pitiless piety we all acclaim
And we pray the song we sing
To succulent sinners salvation brings
And infinite glory to Severina’s name
Severina--rina--rina
Of the Saintress we shall praise
Her ferocious flare for inflicting pain
And thirst for blubbering sinner tears
As she destroyed him with great cheer
All the sinful tremble at Severina’s name
Severina--rina--rina
Of the Saintress sinners should all dread
Punishment of sinners to her pleasure brought
She would devour him with delight
And savour his flavor with every bite
May her cruel cravings never be forgot
Suddenly a high pitched whistle erupted from Plumpkins’, similar to the squealing scream a crab or lobster makes when plunged into a boiling kettle--steam was vigorously escaping from the orifices of his head!
“Quickly--douse the coals!” The Head Sister Chef urgently commanded her underlings “He must remain alive for the Final Scoop of Sacred Salvation!” Buckets of water were sloshed over the Crown of Coals by the attending novitiates, creating a roiling billow of steam.
“Scoop of Salvation?” the youngest bully girl asked with a quizzical look.
“Yes…” Sister Ravenousetta proceeded to patiently explain “Whomever is fortunate enough to be the sister who spoons out and devours the final scoop of a sinner’s brain that results in his death--his very final instant of consciousness--shall receive a special blessing from the Saintress!”
“Bring in the Cranium Cracker!” the Grand Inquistrix cheerfully instructed her Confessional Coven.
“With Pleasure!” Sister Burndicka sang out and bustled off with a jolly “I’ll get it in a jiff!”
Meanwhile, the rest of the Coven extracted with great difficulty the Crown of Coals from Plumpkins’ scorched, blistered and still hissing pate. There were several spots where the metal of the crown had fused to bone and where blackened swollen flesh had become stuck.
All this time, Plumpkins seemed delirious with pain. He was experiencing a level of suffering that was beyond the most wildest imaging--his brain had been cooked to literally within inches of oblivion! But there was still enough of his consciousness left for him to be utterly bewildered at the outlandish, over the top sadism of this throng of unbelievably evil torturesses and inconceivably cruel tormentresses.
Speaking of which, the chuckling Sister Burndicka returned with an enormous iron device resembling scaled up pliers sized to encompass a human skull--the Cranium Cracker! “And here we are…” she chortled. It was ornately decorated, very well crafted and obviously dated from the same medieval era as the accompanying Crown of Coals.
With the help of her fellow Coven members, it was fit upon Plumpkins’ hapless head. Sister Burndicka then urged her leatherclad comrades. “Let me crack him on my own…”
Positioning herself to get a good view of Plumpkins’ eyes, she proceeded to squeeze together the cracker’s arms with wicked glee.
She wanted so very badly for this detestable sinner’s last torment in this world to be one inflicted by her very own hands--her personal victory over all the insufferable depraved iniquity that he and all men represented!
Sister Burndicka’s sturdy shapely build--buxom, wide hipped and thick limbed, gave her the sort of strength that all heavily built women possess. A stoic look of resolve came to her broad cheeked ginger face and with a determined set to her jaw, she emitted a grunt of exertion. Her fiery green eyes bored contemptuously into Plumpkins’ tear gushing orbs as he pitifully looked back at her in helpless horror.
Harder and harder she crushed down, as Plumpkins emitted muffled howls and screams, but his excruciated skull still remained stubbornly intact. Sister Burndicka then gave a long low growl of maximum effort. All her strength was applied as she glared at him--a terrifying snarling mask of enraged hatred!
“WHOAAHWHOAAHWHOAAHWHOAAOOAAOOOAA!” was Plumpkins’ pathetically tormented response until his skull at last split open with a satisfying crackle-popping sound--the upper section briefly taking flight to then fall and rattle about on the floor! His semi-cooked brain was now exposed, still steaming hot and filling the chamber with it’s savoury sweet scent…
A joyous cheer erupted from the crowd as they rushed for a place in line with their spoons in hand. A glowing grin crossed Sister Burndicka’s lips as she wiped the sweat from her brow and proudly received a deluge of congratulatory pats on her back.
The youngest bully girl was gently steered way from the queuing colleens by Sister Ravenousetta’s gentle arm around her shoulder. “Come this way now, there’s something I’m sure you’ll be interested in hearing…” she guided her toward a gathering of the Inquistrix Counsel membership. “Don’t worry--you’ll get your scoop of Sinner Brain Pudding. I’ll be holding a place in line for you…” she promised.
Grand Inquistrix Dominique greeted the youngest bully girl with a broad beaming smile and gestured toward her distinguished colleagues--Prioress Painette, Mother Superior Sufferella and Abbess Aggonee. “We’ve been conferring about you my dear, and all of us agree that you have great potential.”
Sister Ravenousetta excused herself and sauntered back toward Plumpkins.
Dominique then asked “Have you ever considered becoming an Inquistrix? I think you should come back to Europe with the Confessional Coven and I, in order to participate in our apprenticeship program…”
The youngest bully girl gave a gasp of delight “Really--do you mean that?”
All the Inquistrix Counsel nodded. Prioress Painette gave her a hug and declared “Of course--the arrangements are all made, if you’re willing.”
“Yes, yes--a thousand times yes! I would most certainly love dedicating my life to conducting Inquisitions of sinners! That would be absolutely heavenly!” The youngest bully girl began jumping with joy.
Just then, Sister Ravenousetta signaled for her to come over and take her place at Plumpkins’ head. Handing her a spoon upon arrival, the lovely looking nun said “I made certain you would be exactly in time to receive the Final Scoop of Sacred Salvation!”
Sure enough, there was still a flicker of cognizance left in Plumpkins’ brain as the youngest bully girl slid her eating utensil in to bring out a generous steaming gobbet. She leaned close with a sardonic smile and taunted “Say hello to Saintress Severina for us Plumpo, you’re sure to enjoy an eternity in her Devine Dungeon…” she then swallowed it down with savor.
The end.
To be epilogued…
